Warning: I just have to express my frustration a moment.
I like to check out CNN for news updates and whatnot. It's actually our homepage. I was going through the news stories when I saw one titled "Parents Sue Over Russian Adoption." It was actually a video, so I watched it. Then I read the comments that were left below.
Oh dear Lord, I really could punch someone!
Summary: A family adopted a Russian boy when he was two. They had a bunch of problems. Now he's eight, they tested him and he has fetal alcohol syndrome. He is now in an institution. The parents are sueing the adoption agency.
First off, they went six years with their son home without finding out he had fetal alcohol syndrome which was causing all of their problems. No matter where you are adopting from internationally, one of the first things you do is take them to a doctor and have them examined as soon as you get home. I think it's really adoption "common sense".
Second, they adopted from Russia. Now, Eric and I are adopting from the Congo where fetal alcohol syndrome isn't an issue we have to worry about. But I knew about the likelihood of FAS (fetal alcohol syndrome) with Eastern European children. If you are adopting from a foreign country, I would think that it's smart to do some research. If you are not comfortable with the possible issues, then don't adopt from there.
Now, I am not saying that the adoption agency is faultless. They probably did things they shouldn't have and told the families things that didn't happen. But still....
When you make the decision to adopt, especially internationally, you accept the risks that your child is not going to be perfect. Conditions in most countries where adoptions are done are very poor. A lot of times medical records are minimal if existent at all. It just makes me so mad that this family is blaming everything on the agency instead of owning up to the fact that they have a child with FAS and aren't able to handle it.
I feel like we do a lot of research when we buy a new car. Don't you think we should be doing 10x more research when we want to bring a child into our home from another country?! Ugh, it just makes me so mad.
And to top it off, the comments were awful! One man said, "The Russian Government needs to be held accountable for adopting out their un-adoptable children. This little boy is not the only child adopted from Russia with severe psychiatric disorders. American citizens pay thousands of dollars to adopt these children and are being lied to as to the severe trauma they've suffered and their psychiatric issues." UN-ADOPTABLE CHILDREN?! Just because they suffer from physical and psychiatric issues due to their parents and environments (which they have no control over) doesn't mean these children don't deserve loving families! Agh, this guy...I REALLY want to punch him in the face.
So many comments were made like this and many were anti-international adoption in general. It just breaks my heart that people can be so a) ignorant b) stupid enough to make those comments and c) selfish enough to verbally recommend that these children don't deserve to be adopted. My God, I about threw my computer through the window by the time I finished.
I just hope that they encounter a wonderful adoptive family and see what amazing things can happen through adoption and realize how backwards their views were.
Thanks for letting me rant and rave. I am finished :)