A Month of Showers

After eight months, most of you are familiar with the fact that adoption doesn't have a specific "end" date.  We travel to get the boys when we find out we can.  Since accepting the boys as our referrals (July 21), we were given the time line of three to five months for the adoption to be finalized in the Congo.  Once that was complete, we would be able to get embassy appointments and know our travel dates. 

Well, that time line put the adoption finalization between October and December.  Because of this, it was decided to have my showers in September, to ensure I had everything I needed if we were fortunate enough to get the boys and bring them home in October.  This was good thinking and planning on the part of my family and friends.  But to be honest, thinking about showers is REALLY weird.

Now I don't say this to be negative or ungrateful, because I am SO thankful for all of the love our family and friends have shown us.  It's truly incredible.  I think what's weird to me is the fact that I am having showers, but the boys actually coming home seems like a dream.  It's definitely not a reality for me yet.  This is not to say that I am not excited, because I am.  I am oh-so excited to bring them home.  But I have more of a controlled excitement because I know of all the things that can happen and have heard both good and bad stories.

Like I said, it just hasn't hit me that I am going to be a momma of two boys within the next six months (hopefully).  I really don't think it will truly become a reality until they are in my arms.  And based on experiences of other adoptive families, that's not uncommon.  So at least I know that I am not going crazy or anything.

Since our decision to adopt, not much has changed in our lives except that we've been saving and that we remodeled the attic into a bedroom.  I personally do not go through any physical changes, as would a woman who was pregnant.  And as I said before, there is no due date to look forward to.  I have never been to a shower for an adoption, so it seems unusual to me because I can't tell people when the boys are coming, only that it's hopefully soon.  I know it's the best thing to have them now, but with so many unknowns still lingering, a part of me thinks that it seems a little presumptuous.

Again, I say that I am not trying to be ungrateful or unthankful to the numerous women who are putting these showers together.  I am just trying to express my honest feelings about the next few weeks.  I know I am going to have a great time at the showers.  I always love seeing family and spending time together.  And hopefully, as we continually pray, our boys will come home soon and I will be able to utilize all of the wonderful gifts we will receive.

Thank you to everyone and I hope to see you all soon :)